Playing the Cards

Blogger world,... where have you been? Oh yes - the back of my mind is where it seems. I've been slightly preoccupied the past few weeks... all leading up to today, March 25, 2010. But before I can get to today, let's go back a few years... 12 years to be exact...

(This is my official disclaimer to family...and possibly to strangers too - This post will make you cry - it will bring back memories, both happy and tragic - but it's the life we were given and there are some things that we simply are unable to change.)

This June will be 12 years since my dad took our family to Las Vegas for a two week vacation. I was 17 years old and still to this day it is one of my very favorite memories growing up. Actually, I celebrated my 17th birthday while we were there... my sister however, she got the short end of that deal. We got back the day before her birthday and we spent her birthday at the laundromat - washing 2 weeks worth of laundry. Just ask her and she'll tell you all about it.

This picture was taken on June 29, 1998, my Dad's 43 birthday, on our way to dinner at the Mirage Hotel. Little did any of us know that this was the last birthday my dad would have.

Yes, that is me in the green dress... I like to think that I am like my dad when it comes to parenting styles, a bit overprotective, often laying with my kids till they drift off to sleep, strict with grades, often spoiling them, there for everything that's important to them... however - I am very certain that my dad was crazy to let my sister and I wear dresses that were that short... I am also very certain that Kirsten will never have a dress like either of those in her closet.

That summer was one of the best summers of my entire life - or maybe it was just the timing of it. I went to live with my dad that summer and there are a few things I can recall...

1. A home renovation like no other. I'm serious - the whole "living area" of the house was being redone - the kitchen, living room and a bedroom... For weeks,... yes, weeks, we ate dinner on the porch. I remember the day my dad was sanding the spackling on the sheet rock and how silly he looked when he took off his goggles. haha... He was head to toe dust - except where his goggles had been.
   


2. I also remember that I spent most of that summer working on college applications. I took the ASVAB (Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery) with full intent on going into the National Guard. Both my grandfather and my dad had been in the military and I wanted to join... My dad did everything to talk me out of it - though I know he would have supported my decision had I decided to join.
   


3. Finally, I spent my summer learning how to drive in my dad's red Chevy pickup. You want to know how to make me cry instantly...? Well, there are a few ways, but one of them... Just play the song "When Daddy Let Me Drive," by Alan Jackson...
   
   

   "A young girl, two hands on the wheel, I can't replace the way it, made me feel, And he'd say, turn it left now, and steer it right, Straighten up girl now, you're doin' just fine, Just a lil' valley by the river where we'd ride, But I was high on a mountain, when daddy let me drive"
   

   
   

   Are you singing it yet? Well, that's exactly how I remember learning how to drive.

That fall, November 1, 1998, my dad was killed in a work accident. To make a long story short - he was an electrician, and while testing some wires, one short circuited and he was gone.

That was, hands down, the hardest day of my entire life.

For 10 years I dealt with the grief of losing my dad and on the 10 year anniversary of his death, I realized that I needed to live my life and not let the grief consume me anymore. See, I had convinced myself that when I stopped hurting, when I moved on, he would be gone, and I would forget. And that was my biggest fear.

But somehow, I managed to get past the grief - and I felt good - and I quickly learned that getting past that grief didn't mean that I had forgotten. I'll never forget, but now I am able to focus on more then just his death.

On March 24, 2009, 5 months after the 10 year anniversary of my father's death, I bought a book while out running errands. The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. How do I remember that - well, I used the receipt as a bookmark - that's how. I started reading it the next day when I was at the bus stop, waiting for Kirsten's school bus.

You might think I am exaggerating at this next part but I swear to you it's the truth - pg 17, "We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand," and then my phone rang. My brother had been in an accident, critical condition, they were looking for my stepmom. I was frantic - trying to get everything straight. The minutes flew by as I tried to figure out what was going on, trying to get in touch with people,....

And then my phone rang again - He was gone.

To make another long story short - my brother had been working on a dump truck, when the bed of the truck fell - killing him.

This one year anniversary has hit me rather hard. Perhaps it's the fact that this is the second person in my immediate family to die - but not just die - die in a tragic accident. Maybe I just don't deal with grief well. Maybe it's because I never dealt with it to begin with since I found out I was pregnant a few days later and I had to push my grief aside because I was too scared of losing a baby too. It's probably a little of all of it.

But I do have some comfort. My family is not a "religious" family. (Yet somehow I fell in love with and married a pastor's kid) I started going to church around 9th grade or so, but my family didn't come. Yet that Sunday before March 25, 2009, my brother went to church - for the first time that I know of... but not just any church - my father-n-law's church. And my father-n-law gave an invitation that Sunday and AJ accepted. That was three days before he died.

I can't tell you this side of Heaven why certain people have to die when they do. As I sit here today on this 1st anniversary of AJ's death - I might cry my eyes out all day long - and I have - because I know he is gone and I miss him - But I know where he is and I know I will get to see him again. Yes - I have seen tragedy in my life, but I've also been blessed way beyond what I have ever deserved!

But I take comfort in the promise of Jesus, "I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die." John 11:25-26

My God is great & He keeps His promises.

Someday I'll see you again AJ...

I'll see you again.

Moments They'll Remember

This post was supposed to be ready for yesterday.... however, the time change finally got the best of me and I fell asleep early - very early. So early in fact, that I was up well before the alarm even thought to go off this morning, so enjoy yesterday's post & hopefully - despite the gorgeous weather and beautiful sunshine - I'll get my post for today up too!

Yes - I'm one of those overly sappy mothers that get a little too emotional when I realize how quickly my kids are growing up. I let them climb in my bed when they have nightmares, I pick them up and carry them up the stairs at night, I let them climb up on my lap when we read a story, because I know that this time is limited - that soon they will be grown and I won't be able to carry them anymore.

Not to say that I wouldn't have been a sappy mother regardless, but it probably doesn't help that my father died very suddenly in a work accident when I was a senior in high school - or the fact that a year ago this month, my little brother was killed in an accident while working on a dump truck. Both very sudden - both without saying good-bye - both leaving me clinging to all those precious family memories from when I was a kid.

Sure I can recall lots of different memories from growing up, but some of my favorite memories come from simple, precious moments, spent as a family. Fortunately for me - there are many - and I hold them very dear to my heart.

One Saturday several weeks ago, I woke up and decided out of nowhere that I was going to cook a big breakfast for the family. It was a few weeks after Brayden was born, and I was finally starting to feel like a normal person again. (For those of you who don't know, I had some really bad hip issues following Brayden's birth and had some problems walking, moving, etc. for a little over a month) We aren't big breakfast people - mainly because Matt hates breakfast food. How is that possible you ask? I don't know! - but we had all slept in that day, it was past time for breakfast, but not time for lunch and we had lots of errands to run - so I thought maybe a big breakfast sounded good.

So anyway, I got up, dusted off the griddle and got busy mixing pancake batter, cooking sausage and scrambling eggs. The kids loved it - and I think Matt even enjoyed it too.

Then the next week I decided to do it again and before I knew it, I was cooking a big breakfast every Saturday morning. What started off as a virtuous mission one Saturday morning, had quickly turned into one of my families favorite times of the week.

When we do our meal planning for the next week, my kids love deciding what will be on our Saturday morning breakfast menu - blueberry pancakes, chocolate chip pancakes, french toast and the list goes on and on. There is nothing better then family time on a lazy Saturday morning and I love that over the past several weeks, my kids have come to look forward to our Saturday morning "tradition."

Our Saturday morning "tradition" may seem a little silly to some, but I love that it's something special for our family and that it brings us a little closer. In the busy hustle and bustle of our lives, it's so nice to have a time to enjoy each other that isn't rushed... and I hope that several years down the road, when my kids are all grown - and maybe have kids of their own - that our silly little tradition might bring back warm moments they'll remember and cherish.

How do you and your family find ways to spend time with one another? Feel free to share in the comments section... Don't have a family "tradition" of your own - it's not too late to start one today.

Here we are at week #2! Hopefully you didn't have too much trouble getting up this morning with losing an hour of sleep. I know I always hate losing the hour, but I can't complain too much!! For at least the next week or so, the kids won't be waking up at 6am because the sun is streaming through their windows... and I love that we'll have sunshine for an extra hour in the evening! Though the thought of having Brayden's finely tuned nursing schedule disrupted might be a hassle to fix!

I hope that last week's verse - Proverbs 16:3, was able to encourage your spirit! This week I will be memorizing another verse and I hope that you will join me!

This weeks I have chosen Hebrews 11:6 - "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."

Use whatever method you like to memorize this verse and I hope that you have a wonderful week. I would love to hear your comments on my first full week of blogging and if there are any topics you might be interested in, please let me know.

As Long As It Takes

Maybe it's just me, but isn't it funny how some people get so crazy, excited, even a little protective, when it comes to their alma mater? Of course, I'm not referring to myself at all... Ok, so maybe a little.

I'm a very proud graduate from Liberty University and I feel so very blessed to have been able to spend 4 years of my life as a student there. In fact, if I could have my own way, I would live so much closer to Lynchburg, VA then I do right now! I get a little excited when I hear news about the growth of the school and all the changes that are taking place there. I get protective when I hear people talk about Liberty in a negative way - especially in regards to Dr. Falwell. And I'll admit, I do get a little crazy (In a good way of course!) when I know that I am going to be able to go back for a visit - even if it's only for a day or two... and I get very emotional when it's time to leave.

Liberty University represents so much more to me then just a university built on the side of a mountain - It is the place where I learned more about myself in 4 years then I had in 18 years of my life to that point... it is the place where God found me and picked up the pieces of my very broken heart following the sudden death of my dad just months before... it is the place where he knocked on the door of my heart - and where I would answer. Yes - I do love my alma mater.

I am now 481 miles away from Lynchburg, VA, and I always find it rather exciting when I am out and see someone in my area that went to LU. It happens much more often then you would expect. It always catches me off guard - like the night I was in Wegmans and some guy stopped me and asked me if I actually went to LU... and we chatted for a few minutes about what years we graduated, majors, etc. Or the 3 separate times I have been stopped in Walmart by 2 different graduates and a guy who has a daughter in school there right now.

When we started looking for a church in our area, one of the first one's that we looked at was one that my father-in-law had worked at many years ago as a youth leader. To our surprise, as we were checking out the church we found out that our Senior Pastor went to Liberty as well. I know, I know - there are lots of pastors out there who went to LU, but I still think it's cool. (I guess I'm just proving my point about alma mater's,... hehe).

So anyway, getting to the real point of this blog, I remember it was either my sophomore or junior year in college that I took a FACS class and one of my classmates names was Meredith Andrews. Yep - recording artist - Meredith Andrews... Now, I'm in no way claiming that I was best friends with her or anything like that at all. If I recall correctly, we had two or three classes together and that was about it. But I do remember her singing at convocation and church from time to time and that I loved her voice. So, when she came out with her first CD a few years ago, I was super excited to get my copy - and listened to it ALL the time! If you listen to Christian radio at all, you've heard several of the songs on that album titled The Invitation - You Invite Me In, You're Not Alone, just to name a few.

Well, on March 2, 2010, Meredith released her sophomore album titled "As Long As It Takes." Of course I bought it when it came out and have listened to it everyday since and well - here's what I have to say about it: If there is any CD that you decide to buy in the near future - this is the CD!! I love a lot of Christian music, but if I had to compare it to another artist, my first thought when I listened to it was Natalie Grant, (another artist I love). Meredith has an amazing voice and a heart for Jesus that shines through every song on this album. Every song will both encourage you and challenge you to live for Jesus.

Here is a video link from Meredith Andrews about this newest album:

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid35374378001?bctid=69545340001

If you would like to get your copy of Meredith Andrews, As Long As It Takes, you can visit her website - http://www.meredithandrews.com/. Even better - if you purchase your CD by tomorrow, 3/14/10 you can get a second CD free. Keep one in the house and one in the car OR you can pass that second CD along to someone you know in need of a little encouragement!

Transformed - The Making of a 4 Year Old Boy's Dream Bedroom

During my senior year of high school, I was voted "most artistic" in my class. Honestly, I never thought that that was going to get me too far in my life. I'm pretty sure that my 4 year old son is thinking it's a pretty cool thing! In fact, I'm 100% sure that he's glad about it,... or he wouldn't have told me what a cool mommy I am.

Two weeks ago I was sitting in the living room and Matt and I were discussing some of the things we wanted to get done around the house, when it hit me - On 3/31/10, we will have owned this house for 2 years and we have sooooo many projects that we have started.

Oh - you noticed - yep, that's what I said, so many projects that we have started and that we haven't finished. So I decided that we needed to start finishing a few projects before we tried to start another one. This past week, I spent my time transforming my 4 year old son's bedroom.

(David's room when we bought the house - exciting, I know)

(Closet & Bookshelf when we bought the house)

I wish I could show some better before pics of his room, but I didn't own my wide angle lens 2 years ago... but you get the idea - boring blue. I suppose it could have been a whole lot worse.

Little did David know that I was going to begin an entire bedroom makeover for him - actually, I think he got the point because he slept in his sister's room all week long and by the second day he really, I mean really, wanted his bedroom back. So how did we transform this room into every little boys dream bedroom. Simple: Here we go!

We started this project with a good primer and a few coats of yellow paint. David was very clear that he wanted to have his room painted yellow and based on his love of the Transformers, I used an overhead projector to draw Bumble Bee & Optimus Prime on his walls, along with the "logo" for the Autobots. You didn't know I was that awesome with Transformers details, now did you? I went with the animated Transformers because they are a whole lot easier to draw.

To save some money on this part of the project, I printed off a few images of the Transformers from the Internet. Then I used masking tape to tape plastic wrap to the overhead projector. I don't know if you have ever priced transparencies, but they are pretty expensive. Once I traced the images with a marker, I used the projector to draw the 4 foot tall Transformers on the walls and then I painted them.... This part of the project took 10 Hours (for 3 full size paintings) - but I am a TOTAL perfectionist, so it might not take a normal person that long.

Once the images were done, I used black semi-gloss paint to paint the trim in the room black. If you are at all familiar with the movie Transformers or my son's obsession for Bumble Bee, the yellow and black makes total sense.

On the one remaining wall that I had left empty, I attached three movie posters to the wall and I finished off the decorating with his Transformers curtains and comforter.

(Finished room - I'm looking forward to going to get him a cool bed frame this weekend!)

While I was doing this, Matt used a black spray paint to paint the previously yellow bookshelves black. I also had him paint David's closet doors. We waited a few years to paint David's room because we had a huge issue with him coloring on his walls and we didn't want to go through all the work to have it ruined. So, I thought it would be cool to paint David's closet doors with chalkboard paint. What a cool idea that turned out to be!!!! You can buy chalkboard spray paint for about $4 a can at Walmart, or you can buy a small can of actual chalkboard paint for about $9. The spray paint only does about 10-15 square feet, so the chalkboard paint was a much better choice for this project. Now David has his own area to color and practice his letters without totally destroying the walls.

(This was taken after David got to see his room! We didn't let him peel till it was done.)

For a final touch to the room - and since the Transformers come from outer space - I wanted to paint the ceiling of David's bedroom. Now normally this is a remodel no-no. Painting the ceiling a color besides white tends to make the ceiling look a lot lower, however, this is a little boys dream bedroom and not my living room, so I wanted to go all out. Yep - I painted it black and then attached 130 glow in the dark stars.

So what was David's reaction to this totally transformed Transformer inspired bedroom? See for yourself....

I think it's safe to say that he loved it! I can't keep him out of his room and even better.... when I tuck him into bed at night, he tries to count the stars until he falls asleep!

Menu Planning

A few months ago Matt and I sat down to review our monthly expenses and realized we were spending way too much money. The worst part was that a huge chunk of what we were spending money on was eating out. Even worse was that we were eating out so much because of poor planning. Either we were out running errands and it would have been too late to cook once we got back home, or it was that we had food in the house, but were missing ingredients for basically every recipe we could come up with. On top of that, I was pregnant and we all know how pregnant women can go a little crazy when they are craving something.

At the beginning of the year I decided that I was going to begin menu planning for our family and boy has it ever made the difference! Here are a few ways that my family has benefited from menu planning and how your family can too:

• Menu Planning Saves $$$ - Before menu planning, I would just walk through the store and buy what looked good. I didn't have certain meals in mind and on the rare occasion that I did, I would forget at least one key ingredient. Menu planning allows me to come up with several meals for the week and then create a grocery list of everything that I am going to need for those meals. It allows for me to cut back on impulse shopping because when I have a list, I'm less likely to buy stuff I don't need and less food goes to waste. In addition, menu planning can save you money by making it easier to buy in bulk. We like chicken, so it's great to be able to buy a big pack of chicken for $10 and be able o make 4 meals, rather then spending $6 for a smaller pack that will only make one meal.


• Menu Planning Saves Time - When you sit down once a week and create a menu, you already know what is going to be for dinner each night of the week. This saves me time because I can just pull what I need from the freezer the night before and it's ready for me the next day. In addition, planning out your meals means you don't have to run out to the store for an ingredient... (or make your husband stop and grab something on the way home from work, hehe - but I've never done that before!) Another way menu planning helps to save me time is that when I buy that big pack of chicken, I already know what four meals I am going to cook with it. So, when I'm cutting up the chicken for chicken fajitas on night one, I can also chop up the chicken for our chicken spiedie dinner on night two and throw it in the marinade overnight. Then I can slice up the chicken for night 3 for our chicken stir fry dinner and bag and freeze that and I can dice up the chicken that I need for chicken salad at the end of the week and bag and freeze that. Not only have I saved time by dividing and chopping the chicken for all my meals at once, but when it's time to cook those meals, I won't have to thaw and cut it that night AND that I'll only have to wash the cutting board one time instead of 4 times! Maybe that sounds a bit crazy to you, but with three little kids running around - EVERY minute of my day matters!


• Menu Planning Improves Nutrition - When you plan out your meals, it only makes sense that your they would be more balanced because you can sit down and count out your food groups in the beginning of the week. Menu planning reduces the chances that you'll swing by the drive-thru on the way home because you don't know what you are going to cook and because you are shopping from a list, you are more likely to have healthy foods within your reach.

The best part about menu planning is that there is no right or wrong way to do it! You can plan for one week, two weeks or a whole month. I personally shop one week at a time. I love doing my grocery shopping on Wednesday nights while the kids are at Awana. The grocery store is right down the road from the church, so I also save on gas because it's out of my way to go to the grocery store during the day while the kids are in school.

Likewise, you don't have to plan every single meal out. I know that my kids don't like to sit down for breakfast during the week. They would much rather grab something that they can take with them for the ride to school. Usually fruit or dry cereal and juice, so I like to stock up on a variety of grab-and-go kinds of breakfast items for them. In the morning when I'm trying to feed the baby and Matt is trying to get ready for work, the kids go right into the pantry and get what they want. Snacks around our house are usually the same way, with lots of variety in the fridge like yogurt, string cheese or fruit. I love sandwiches, so I keep a good variety of sandwich supplies handy and David and I are able to pick what we want at lunchtime. So when it comes time to make my grocery list for Breakfast, Lunch & Snacks, my list looks pretty similar from week to week. For us, the menu planning is key for dinner.

While I make a lot of different types of foods for my family, I LOVE my crock pot! I use it at least a few times a week to make my dinners. Why you ask? Well, I love that I can just toss all the ingredient in and let it do it's own thing. I love having that extra time to spend with the kids after they get home from school and get homework done. I don't want to be spending that time slaving in my kitchen. Not to mention that by 5pm, I'm starting to get a wee bit tired from a busy day, so I find that my life is much easier when I get up in the morning while Brayden is taking his morning nap and get the crock pot going!

If you like using a crock pot or if you have been looking for some good crock pot recipes you'll want to check this out. I have a whole lot of cookbooks, with my most recent to the collection being this one! Fix-It & Forget-It 5 Ingredients!!!! I love that the recipes have only 5 ingredients (well there are a few in there that have more then that, but most of them are only 5 ingredients). I picked a copy of this up in the magazine section of Wegmans and you can find it on display until 5/21/10. Three of my dinner plans for this week came from this book - Taco Soup, Creamy Chicken & Stuffing and North Carolina BBQ (Which was amazing!)

I would love to hear your suggestions for meal planning in my comments section! Or if you have a great crock pot recipe that you would like to share with others, feel free to post it in my comments. I always like to try out recipes that come recommended from others... sometimes I get a little nervous (Well, Matt does anyway) when I'm trying out a new recipe for the first time. Happy cooking!

Diaper Mishaps

What a day it has been today! I know today is "Clothing & Textiles Day" and I was working on a an entry for today, but then today happened. That's right - not a typo - today happened. My topic for today was going to be on Laundry Disasters (Come back next Wed and I'll be covering this topic) but today was one laundry disaster after another - and NOT for the reason you think or the meaning I had intended!

So today I'll be sharing my own "Consumer Review" on a product that has made my day less then amusing!

This is Brayden and he is my 10 week old bundle of love! There are a little over 4 years between him and his older brother, so when I found out I was pregnant again, of course I went on a small shopping spree for baby stuff! I had lots of great coupons and deals over the nine months of being pregnant and was excited when I snagged a great deal on a new brand of baby diapers by Fisher-Price at Toys R Us.

I'm sure you can imagine just how thrilled I must be with these diapers, right? Wrong. So, so wrong. While I'll admit, these diapers can hold there share of... baby waste... hehe, I don't have much good to say about them at all.

For starters, Brayden just got into this size diaper.... so there really should be no issue with them... Part way through the day today I picked up Brayden and thought to myself, "I just changed him... he really must have had to go to the bathroom since his diaper is clear down to his knee." When I went to change him, I realized that that was not the problem... The Velcro tabs had come undone and the diaper had wiggled it's way down the side of his pants.

Now I'll admit - at first I was pretty sure this was my doing and not the diaper, but then it happened again. Two outfits down and it was only noon. We're off to a good - I mean pretty lousy - start to the day. This time, I made sure the tabs were on really good. Not too loose, not too tight. They were indeed nice and secure, so I got outfit number three on and thought that would be the end of it.

Then Kirsten came home. Kirsten is really good with her little brother - I mean REALLY good. She can calm that boy down when nobody else can, (unless of course he's hungry and then only mama can calm him, hehe). Anyway, Kirsten usually holds Brayden for at least a half hour when she gets home, but about 10 minutes into holding him, he was mad and Kirsten couldn't calm him down, so I took him and realized he was 100% soaked! Oh no!!! Or should I say - Oh yes! #1 & #2 and none of it made it in the diaper... Why you ask? Because the Velcro was not longer attached.

I'm sorry Fisher-Price, but three strikes and you are out.

So to all my fellow mommy readers out there, I recommend sticking with a brand that is more reliable. (I personally like Huggies for my little guy.) I know that it can be tempting to go with something a little cheaper to help the budget out, but these diapers are simply not worth the mess they cause - and I mean that it the most literal way possible!